The Impact of Sexual Exploitation and Abuse on Males

Can Males Be Sexually Exploited?

Yes, boys - and men - can be victims of sexual exploitation and abuse. And the abuser may be either male or female.

If you are a male who has been sexually abused, you are not alone. Statistics¹ show that 12% to 32% of boys and men have been sexually abused at some point during their lives. Because males are less likely to report that they have been sexually taken advantage of, it is likely that there are many more who have been victimized.

^{1. Adapted from: Matthews, F. The Invisible boy: revisioning the victimization of male children and teens - Health Canada, 1996.}

Some Facts:

Of the boys and men who report having been sexually abused or exploited, statistics report that the abuse was likely to have been perpetrated by:

an adult female 37% of the time
an adult male 33% of the time
a female teenager 19% of the time
a male teenager 12 % of the time

Sexual abuse is not “playing doctor”, or the result of simple curiosity or experimentation between young people of similar ages and maturity levels. Usually, it is carefully planned out by an older abuser who knows exactly what they are doing and how to get what they want. Adults who habitually target young people for their own sexual pleasure are known as pedophiles.

What is Abusive?

How Does Abuse Start?

Sexual abuse or exploitation of males starts when others take sexual advantage of a boy’s age or sexual interests through lying, power, seduction or trickery.

Most boys and teens have a high interest in sexual activities; this is well known to experienced abusers who know how to take advantage of it. Abusers may, for example, use sexual talk or pornography to arouse him. Friendship, alcohol or drugs may sometimes be used to lower his resistance. To a young person, this can be exciting and feel as though he is being treated as an adult. This leaves the boy vulnerable to sexual exploitation, yet also believing that he is a willing participant or has no choice.

Sexual activities like this are not caring, mutual, consenting or fair. They are aggressive and pushy, with the abusive person controlling what happens in order to meet their own personal needs for power, sexual excitement or control. The impact of premature or inappropriate exposure to sexual activities on a young male is of little or no concern to the abuser.

Healthy Sexual Activity Happens When:

people are old enough to understand the potential impact of what they are doing together
they are about the same age
there is no exploitation, trickery or force
there is mutual consent and pleasure

Was I Taken Advantage Of?

It’s Hard To Talk About

Males often have a hard time admitting that they have been sexually exploited. Most sexual activity (even if it is exploitative) is exciting, private and pleasurable. Boys and men in our culture are taught early in life that to be victimized is a sign of weakness. They may fear that their friends or family will blame or punish them for what happened, or humiliate them. For many reasons, males too often decide that they will be better off if nobody finds out and keep it secret.

Without disclosure, support and treatment, boys in particular are vulnerable to further exploitation, and to the long term emotional, social and sexual impact of premature sexual activity and abuse.

Abuse By Females:

It is not uncommon for teenaged boys to be sexually exploited by older female teens or women. This kind of abuse usually goes unrecognized or unreported because in our culture males often consider this kind of sexual experience to be a lucky opportunity and not abusive. It is, nevertheless, inappropriate and abusive, often leaving boys overstimulated and preoccupied with sex.

Abuse By Males:

Disclosure is especially hard for teens to make if the perpetrator was a male. Sexual exploitation by a male creates many worries about sexual identity, self esteem and fears that they will be teased or rejected for participating in “gay” sexual activities. Parents may have similar concerns; they often worry that their son will turn out to be “gay” or a sexual predator as an adult.

Abusers and Their Impact

Who Are The Abusers?

People who sexually abuse males are often in positions of trust and responsibility. They are usually several years older than the victim but may be the same age or even younger. They may be either male or female. Often they have been exposed to bullying, sexual abuse or other kinds of exploitation in their own lives, and selfishly take out their experience on males who are vulnerable and easily exploited.

What Is The Impact?

The impact of sexual aggression on males always needs to be assessed and treated. The kind of abuse experienced by a male needs to be considered within the context of his maturity level, personality, how much pressure is put on him to keep quiet, and the ability of his family to be supportive. Without help, some possible outcomes are:

emotional and stress-related problems
acting out or self-destructive behaviours which cover up emotional problems
increased preoccupation with sexual matters
difficulty with intimacy or in establishing close relationships
unsafe or unsatisfying sexual practices
difficulty setting personal limits
feelings of personal inadequacy
confusion and excessive worry about sexual and personal identity
exploiting or abusing others

Rev. 10/02